 |
| The UK will now rightly appear as a blot on the landscape |
There's a 'correct the map' movement out there pushing to ban Mercator projections of the world for inflating places like Greenland at the expense of the likes of Africa.
As one of the nation's leading geographers I was contacted recently by the native Emperor penguin community of Antarctica, who asked me to intervene in order to promote the adoption of a bird's-eye view of the world that recognises their right to self-determination.
They comment: 'For too long on whichever map of the world is foisted upon us we appear as a dirty smudge along the bottom. Our projection features you as a sort of tide-mark around a miner's bath. Like that do you? Hurts, doesn't it?'
 |
| The map of the world penguins are asking the UN to ratify |
Ed. On the above map (1) marks his house, (2) where his brother drowned, (3) his parents' house and (4) the bonus ball.
